Slessor

Two chronometers the captain had,
One by Arnold that ran like mad,
One by Kendal in a walnut case,
Poor devoted creature with a hangdog face.

I was going to write a "spoof" of this stanza for a post comparing two cookbooks I had bought recently, when it occurred to me that the number of people who knew Kenneth Slessor's poem well enough to recognise a spoof could probably be numbered on one hand... and they probably don't read this blog.

Which suddenly made me feel very sad, and prompted me to put off the post concerning cookbooks in favour of a post concerning Kenneth Slessor. For anyone who would like to read the whole poem, you can find it here.

It's actually an excerpt from a longer poem called Five Visions of Captain Cook, but invariably these five stanzas on the chronometers end up being published in anthologies, while the rest of the poem is left out. I don't believe I have ever read the whole poem myself, only various excerpts like "Two Chronometers".

Kenneth Slessor was an Australian poet who wrote in the first half of the 20th century. Yes, believe it or not, Australia does have more than one poet on the books.

I know about him because I took Speech and Drama classes as a child (and as a teenager, and as an adult), and had to cover Australian poetry on more than one occasion. Most people, though, have probably never heard of him. Just like they've never heard of Charles Harpur, Henry Kendall or Mary Gilmore.

I'd like to point out that Mary Gilmore is quite a noteworthy poet - literally. She's on the current Australian $10 note, on the opposite side to Andrew Barton (Banjo) Patterson.

Ah, you've heard of that one, have you? Waltzing Matilda, The Man from Snowy Mountain and Clancy of the Overflow are Australian poems you may actually know about?

Hmm.

Meanwhile, how many $10 notes have you seen in the last ten years? Did it ever occur to you to ask who the chick on the other side was?

Anyway, I mentioned those poets in particular because they are, believe it or not, quite "famous", as far as Australian poets go. Pick up any book on Australian poetry and you'll find a number of poems by these writers.

Slessor's "Two Chronometers" excerpt is the first poem in the most ubiquitous book of Australian poetry in existence - This Land, an anthology selected by another famous Australian poet, Judith Wright. You can pick up Wright's anthology in any second-hand book store or charity op-shop in the country, I expect. I think I saw six copies of it at the last book fair.

Oh, come on. Of course you've heard of Judith Wright. Why, she and Bruce Dawe are considered to be among the most important poets in Australian literature, and are practically responsible for every anthology of Australian anything that you've ever read...

What? Oh, sorry. I hadn't realised you've never read an anthology of Australian poetry. No, no, it makes perfect sense. Quite frankly, if it wasn't written by 'Banjo' Paterson or Henry Lawson, there's no reason why an Australian would even dream of reading Australian poetry on purpose.

What? You've never read any of their poems either? What about Waltzing Matilda? Surely you've read that one? No? You've just sung the chorus on occasion. Okay. That makes sense, too. No one would actually think a song about a homeless bum who steals a sheep and commits suicide would make a good national anthem if they knew the lyrics.

Look, it's not like Australian poetry is particularly bad. I think quite a bit of it is really good. That Slessor poem, for example, does lovely things with rhythm and pace and is a brilliant poem to recite. I mean, if you've read any British or American poetry, you wouldn't think the Australian poetry was in any way inferior...

Oh. You don't read poetry as a general rule. Okay. No, no. Don't worry about it. That's perfectly normal behaviour for an Australian. Poetry is, after all, for wusses and toffy-nosed gits who can't get a real job. I think it's pretty normal behaviour for most people in the Western World, isn't it?

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go somewhere and cry.